Going Commando (With No Muffin Top)

 

Among my greatest fears: becoming infected with flesh-eating bacteria, being stranded in the shark-infested open sea, having a muffin top.

And let's face it, that last one is by far more likely to happen to most of us (size zero scuba divers notwithstanding). Material Girl is a little soft in the middle, but I know the appropriate size and rise of jean to wear and I skip certain articles of clothing on non-skinny days, thus generally avoiding the dreaded and unattractive waistband spill-over.

But, even after slimming down a few years ago, I'd never found a brand of tights that was not muffin-top inducing. (They all lived up to their name.) I love the look of tights and I like to wear skirts and dresses in cooler weather when bare legs are inappropriate, so I kept trying. I'd find a new brand, put them on in the morning, and head to the ladies room 10 minutes after arriving at work to de-tights. They were uncomfortable and made me feel both self-conscious and a little a nauseated. I tried buying larger sizes, but they were baggy in the legs and still too tight at the waist. I even tried snipping waistbands, but then I'd just have to tug at my tights all day as they slipped down.

Then I discovered Commando tights. They have a high, non-rolling waistband that actually looks like it's meant to go on a full-grown woman's body when you pull it out of the package. They are comfy and create a smooth line even under clingy dresses. The last few years I could only find them in black and brown (both footless and footed), so I was very exited to get a box of colored and patterned tights from ShopBop recently. Last week I wore a ribbed red pair with Foley + Corrina black velvet shorts purchased from a MYHABIT event, black Frye harness boots, and a favorite gray glen plaid jacket I got from the Gap a million years ago when they still made good stuff--it was very Angus Young meets Rachel Bilson.

If you are a tights fan, give Commando a try. You can find an array of colored opaque tights (red, purple, army green and more) plus sheerer styles including fishnet, polka dot and lace. They will transform your fall and winter wardrobe and you'll be doing your part to help us achieve a muffin-top free world. (Find varying Commando tights styles at ShopBop, HerRoom and Bare Necessities.)